Here’s How to Survive The Affair - 7-Part Marriage Saving Course
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Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Coming To Terms With Infidelity
When someone in a relationship engages in infidelity, what happens next? After someone cheats in a relationship, there are three situations that might occur, two of which lead to surviving infidelity:
- The couple comes to terms with the infidelity; they discuss why the infidelity occurred and their resulting feelings. They stay together, survive infidelity and get stronger.
- The couple decides to stay together to work through feelings of anger, remorse, or betrayal. They survive infidelity, but not necessarily happily.
- The couple decides to end the relationship altogether. They don’t survive infidelity.
Coming To Terms With Infidelity
Behavior doesn’t happen without a reason. Both a cheating spouse and a faithful spouse have reasons for actions which led to infidelity. A couple can start the healing process when they come to terms with the infidelity. This means that both people agree to stop engaging in denial, blame, or attack, all of which create more damage in the relationship, and begin the process of surviving infidelity.
The couple should attend marital counseling, at least during the first few weeks after the affair, so they can communicate in an environment that allows both people to freely and safely vent their feelings. Also, marital counseling provides a trained professional who can give the couple honest, open, and objective feedback. This information can improve their communication skills and help them discuss the infidelity without personal attacks. Also, it gives the couple time to work on surviving the infidelity and saving the relationship, instead of quickly moving toward separation or divorce.
Surviving Infidelity
When a couple agrees to continue the relationship, the issue of trust is paramount to both. The person who had an affair wants to be trusted when they promise to remain faithful. The faithful spouse needs to be assured that their unfaithful partner will not cheat with anyone else.
The relationship will be helped significantly if the couple asks themselves a few questions:
- What was our initial attraction, and why did we originally enjoy about being together?
- How did we bond? Was it mutual interests, similar character traits, a sense of humor?
If the couple can spend time together, enjoying each other and the pursuits that led to their mutual attraction, they will be working to create the bond that was lost. They won’t be spending unnecessary time on the behaviors that led to infidelity. Hopefully, they will survive infidelity.
Ending The Relationship
When a relationship ends, how do you get over the fact that it’s over? How do you get through each day knowing that the person you planned to spend the rest of your life with is gone? How do you learn to be alone again?
Click Here!
When a relationship ends, people frequently console the faithful spouse by saying “it’s time to move on” or “you need to get over it.” It’s extremely difficult to “move on” or “get over it.” Just about every aspect of our lives is affected when we lose someone we love; and yet, we know that it’s unhealthy to let the end of a relationship take control over the other priorities in our lives. Other people count on us, whether it’s our family of origin, children, friends, or co-workers.
It isn’t possible to completely come to terms with the end of any type of relationship. We can accept the fact that it did end, and we can work to improve the quality of our lives in the future. We must accept that the relationship did not survive infidelity, but that we can work to overcome the trauma and build a happier life in the future.
*** INFIDELITY 101 ***
Let's start out by talking about the laws of nature.
When it rains you get wet. Big animals eat small animals.
If you don't drink water you will die. People cheat on each
other.
Did you catch the last one?
Human beings are not monogamous by nature. We don't mate
exclusively for life with the first partner we choose.
We have many mates throughout our lifetime.
And we don't just have sex to reproduce.
Some animals do. Human beings do not.
But when it comes to infidelity, people think that the laws
of nature do not apply to them.
They think that no one would ever cheat on them because
they're too good in bed, too good looking, too wealthy, too
good at this, too good at that and so on and so on.
"He would never do that to me, he loves me"
"She would never do that, she has it too good"
The #1 biggest, most notorious reason why affairs go
undetected is because people refuse to believe that it can
happen to them.
Well let me tell you right now that the laws of nature apply
to everyone -- including you.
I don't care who you are - a celebrity - a bum - a mother -
a father - a nobody.
Anyone, and I mean anyone, can cheat on you.
If you don't accept this fact, you will miss every little
thing your lover does that screams "I'm cheating on you".
Let me tell you a little story...
An old friend came to my door one day to cry on my shoulder
about the troubles he was having with his wife.
She was doing all of this strange things, he saw her hugging
another man in a parking lot, she wouldn't sleep in the same
bed with him and so on.
I mean any 6 year old could have seen she was cheating on
him.
It was that obvious.
But he refused to believe it.
Why?
Well here were his answers, in order:
1. He pays for everything and he doesn't cheat on her, so
why would she cheat?
2. He asked her if she was cheating and she said no.
3. He's smarter than her.
This is the perfect example of someone who doesn't think the
laws of nature apply to them.
He couldn't believe that someone would cheat on him. He
couldn't "get over himself".
And the fact of the matter is that almost everyone thinks
this way at one time or another.
If you don't believe that it can happen to you, if you think
that you are that one special person in the universe where
the laws of nature don't apply to you, you're going to have
a miserable time of it.
Want to know what ended up happening to my old friend?
He's currently going through a bitter divorce that he
doesn't want. She left him and was the one that filed. And
gee, she also has a boyfriend that works at the same place
she does!
And he still can't believe what's happening to him!
Does this sound similar to anyone you know?
Now let's recap the most important points for you to know:
1. You must accept the cold hard facts that anyone can and
will cheat on you. It's human nature. If you don't "get
over yourself" and accept this, you're in for a lot of
misery.
2. Don't ever expect your lover to admit to you that they
are having an affair. If you're waiting for this to happen,
it will be the longest wait of your life.
Would you like even more information on how to catch a
cheating lover? Click here now http://www.catchacheat.com
When it rains you get wet. Big animals eat small animals.
If you don't drink water you will die. People cheat on each
other.
Did you catch the last one?
Human beings are not monogamous by nature. We don't mate
exclusively for life with the first partner we choose.
We have many mates throughout our lifetime.
And we don't just have sex to reproduce.
Some animals do. Human beings do not.
But when it comes to infidelity, people think that the laws
of nature do not apply to them.
They think that no one would ever cheat on them because
they're too good in bed, too good looking, too wealthy, too
good at this, too good at that and so on and so on.
"He would never do that to me, he loves me"
"She would never do that, she has it too good"
The #1 biggest, most notorious reason why affairs go
undetected is because people refuse to believe that it can
happen to them.
Well let me tell you right now that the laws of nature apply
to everyone -- including you.
I don't care who you are - a celebrity - a bum - a mother -
a father - a nobody.
Anyone, and I mean anyone, can cheat on you.
If you don't accept this fact, you will miss every little
thing your lover does that screams "I'm cheating on you".
Let me tell you a little story...
An old friend came to my door one day to cry on my shoulder
about the troubles he was having with his wife.
She was doing all of this strange things, he saw her hugging
another man in a parking lot, she wouldn't sleep in the same
bed with him and so on.
I mean any 6 year old could have seen she was cheating on
him.
It was that obvious.
But he refused to believe it.
Why?
Well here were his answers, in order:
1. He pays for everything and he doesn't cheat on her, so
why would she cheat?
2. He asked her if she was cheating and she said no.
3. He's smarter than her.
This is the perfect example of someone who doesn't think the
laws of nature apply to them.
He couldn't believe that someone would cheat on him. He
couldn't "get over himself".
And the fact of the matter is that almost everyone thinks
this way at one time or another.
If you don't believe that it can happen to you, if you think
that you are that one special person in the universe where
the laws of nature don't apply to you, you're going to have
a miserable time of it.
Want to know what ended up happening to my old friend?
He's currently going through a bitter divorce that he
doesn't want. She left him and was the one that filed. And
gee, she also has a boyfriend that works at the same place
she does!
And he still can't believe what's happening to him!
Does this sound similar to anyone you know?
Now let's recap the most important points for you to know:
1. You must accept the cold hard facts that anyone can and
will cheat on you. It's human nature. If you don't "get
over yourself" and accept this, you're in for a lot of
misery.
2. Don't ever expect your lover to admit to you that they
are having an affair. If you're waiting for this to happen,
it will be the longest wait of your life.
Would you like even more information on how to catch a
cheating lover? Click here now http://www.catchacheat.com
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Don't let what happened to me happen to you
Investigate Anyone, Anytime
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With Investigate123me.com , you will be accessing the most complete and current information. Practically any information you can think of, except for very sensitive personal information, i.e., financial and credit card passwords and full account numbers, is available to you online. You will be able to lookup information about people in the United States, Canada, United Kingdom - we have the most databases and data centers available for these three countries. Also, we have a fewer number of options for people living elsewhere in the world.
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» BUSINESS RECORDS - Reports include business addresses, UCC filings, court rulings, and more.
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If you are ready to delve into this wealth of information, visit the registration page at www.Investigate123me.com
With Investigate123me.com , all records are at your fingertips. Background checks, court records, phone investigations, criminal records, public records, and people searches can all be accomplished quickly and discreetly. The authentic Investigate123me.com , a recognized and trusted online records information provider, lets you utilize a network of multiple data sources to find the exact records you are looking for. Get the data from thousands of sources, public and private, quickly and conveniently right to your screen. Find the information you are seeking without the need of hiring a professional investigator!
Investigations are easy and can be completed in just three easy steps:
1) Search – Search over 1 billion records from state and federal agencies with one click
2) Register – Registration gives you access to all our records and resources
3) View Reports – Instantly view and print all of your reports
With Investigate123me.com , you will be accessing the most complete and current information. Practically any information you can think of, except for very sensitive personal information, i.e., financial and credit card passwords and full account numbers, is available to you online. You will be able to lookup information about people in the United States, Canada, United Kingdom - we have the most databases and data centers available for these three countries. Also, we have a fewer number of options for people living elsewhere in the world.
The categories and reports accessible for searching are extensive:
ONLINE INVESTIGATIONS:
» BACKGROUND RECORDS - Reports include addresses, relatives, phones, properties, judgments.
» CRIMINAL RECORDS - Reports include case #, charge, offense, arrest, file, disposition, sentence.
» LEGAL RECORDS - Reports include property, liens, judgments, business records, and more.
» SSN RECORDS - Reports include Social Security Number validations and death records.
» SEX OFFENDERS - Reports include registered addresses, aliases, case #, charge, conviction.
» CREDIT RECORDS - Reports include subject's credit history, credit worthiness, bankruptcies, and more.
CIVIL RECORDS:
» BIRTH RECORDS - Reports include date, case, number, filings, parents, addresses.
» DEATH RECORDS - Reports include date, case, number, filings, name, age, relatives.
» DIVORCE RECORDS - Reports include filing type, date, case, location, name, age, properties.
» MARRIAGE RECORDS - Reports include filing type, date, case, location, name, age, properties.
» PROPERTY RECORDS - Reports include owner, location, transfers, sales, description, tax info.
» BANKRUPTCY RECORDS - Reports include date, case, number, reason, legal files, addresses.
PEOPLE SEARCH:
» PEOPLE SEARCH - Reports include people location and missing people information.
» MISSING PERSONS - Reports include relatives, roommates, neighbors, aliases, address history.
REVERSE LOOKUP:
» REVERSE PHONE - Reports include full addresses, names, contacts, account history.
» REVERSE CELL PHONE - Reports include full addresses, names, contacts, account history.
» REVERSE EMAIL - Reports include full addresses, names, contacts, account history.
» REVERSE IP ADDRESS - Reports include hosting records, website owner records, addresses.
OTHER RECORDS:
» BUSINESS RECORDS - Reports include business addresses, UCC filings, court rulings, and more.
» NON-US RECORDS - Reports include limited records for Canada and UK.
MEMBER RESOURCES:
» STATE RECORDS - Includes powerful search resources for every US state.
» EBOOKS - Our proprietary information books on a huge variety of topics and categories
If you are ready to delve into this wealth of information, visit the registration page at www.Investigate123me.com
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